What’s the Temperature of Your Tone?

Several weeks ago, a dear friend of mine called me on the verge of tears.   She was frustrated with her younger sister, who has a habit of giving unsolicited advice.  In other words, she minds every one else’s business besides her own.  Even more so, she hates the way her sister often talks to her. After suggesting that she try to talk things out with her sibling, I thought about my own.  I’m sure if my brother had been on a conference call with us, he would have joined in with my friend’s complaints.  Guiltily I thought, “How many times had he and I argued because of my blistering tone?”  To make matters worse, I don’t always think before I speak.

After our call ended, I silently pondered, “I, too, need to watch how I say things sometimes; particularly, to my brother.”   Of course then, my flesh suddenly rose up and I thought, “Well, he doesn’t know how to talk to me either!”  But, before I could even mentally conjecture up his list of faults, the Holy Spirit gently reminded me of mine.  Too many to count, I’m afraid!

All in all, I really do want a better relationship with my brother and sister.  Once I humbled myself, the Eternal Father helped me to realize that our tone is similar to the temperature of water. It can be cold, hot or warm. After a moment of reflection, I prayed, “Lord, please teach me how to watch the temperature of my tone!”

Just think about it!  When water is very cold, it’s prone to freeze.  It then becomes stiff and unmoving.   When our words are frigid and insensitive, people can see us as callous (unmoving) or with no compassion (stiff).   Really hot water is impossible to swallow.  When our conservation becomes too emotional or heated, it too, can be hard for others to receive (swallow).  Ahhh…but when a liquid is at room temperature or warm, it’s easier for us to digest or receive.  The same could be said for our tone.  Now, for a moment let’s forget about how we prefer our Iced Tea!  We’re reviewing these examples from a spiritual perspective, not one based on dining preferences, please. 🙂

Proverbs 13:3 NIV tells us, “Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin.”  If you, too, struggle with your tone, dear heart, don’t worry, you’re in good company. With Jesus Christ, there is always good news!  What exactly is that, you might ask?  Once we humble ourselves to the Holy Counselor, anything is possible!  Instead of pushing others away with our tone, we’ll draw them closer to the warmth of our love.  Ask yourself…As Children of the Most High God, isn’t that the least we should do?